We’ve been living in a time where being stressed, depressed, anxious and burnt out has been normalised to an unhealthy level. It’s become normal to be living an unfulfilled life. Prescription antidepressants are at an all-time high, despite the advances in technology and healthcare, people are living longer, but not better. The quality of life isn’t as high as it could be. We’re not happy, and this is sometimes considered normal. But normal isn’t natural.
NATURAL V NORMAL
Burn out and stress has started to become so normal, that it’s almost looked upon as if you’re doing something wrong if you’re not struggling through life. We can easily find ourselves in a habitual state of drift, sleepwalking through life on autopilot, not tapping into our own willpower to live a life of freedom and happiness.
But we’re starting to wake up. We’re no longer living in a time of industrial revolution where we have to get any job to just pay the bills. I believe that we are all entitled to follow our own unique passions and gifts and live the life we would all love to live.
I’ve met swimming teachers that love what they do, and I’ve met swimming teachers that can’t stand the job. I’ve worked with doctors that never wanted to be a doctor and who dream of quitting but can’t because it would be seen as a failure. I’ve met checkout staff who are joyful and bring a smile to each customer’s face. I’ve met builders that love building houses, and I’ve met builders that would rather be pursuing their dreams of opening their own restaurant.
I believe that if everyone followed their hearts, everything would work out harmoniously. We’d still have people to build our houses and serve us drinks if we wanted to go to a restaurant for dinner. There would still be therapists that loved doing therapy, (but we’d need less of them!) We’d still have people that would landscape our gardens, we’d have lawyers who were passionate about societal rules, and we’d have politicians who wanted to bring world peace and end hunger worldwide.
This is a guidebook to following your heart and waking up to any thoughts that are getting in your way leaving you free to be whoever you want to be.
One day a fisherman was lying on a beautiful beach, with his fishing pole propped up in the sand and his solitary line cast out into the sparkling blue surf. He was enjoying the warmth of the afternoon sun and the prospect of catching a fish.
About that time, a businessman came walking down the beach, trying to relieve some of the stress of his workday. He noticed the fisherman sitting on the beach and decided to find out why this fisherman was fishing instead of working harder to make a living for himself and his family. “You aren’t going to catch many fish that way,” said the businessman to the fisherman.
“You should be working rather than lying on the beach!”
The fisherman looked up at the businessman, smiled and replied, “And what will my reward be?”
“Well, you can get bigger nets and catch more fish!” was the businessman’s answer. “And then what will my reward be?” asked the fisherman, still smiling. The businessman replied, “You will make money and you’ll be able to buy a boat, which will then result in larger catches of fish!”
“And then what will my reward be?” asked the fisherman again.
The businessman was beginning to get a little irritated with the fisherman’s questions. “You can buy a bigger boat, and hire some people to work for you!” he said.
“And then what will my reward be?” repeated the fisherman.
The businessman was getting angry. “Don’t you understand? You can build up a fleet of fishing boats, sail all over the world, and let all your employees catch fish for you!”
Once again the fisherman asked, “And then what will my reward be?”
The businessman was red with rage and shouted at the fisherman, “Don’t you understand that you can become so rich that you will never have to work for your living again! You can spend all the rest of your days sitting on this beach, looking at the sunset. You won’t have a care in the world!”
The fisherman, still smiling, looked up and said, “And what do you think I’m doing right now?”
We can all be that fisherman. (And if we enjoy growing businesses, we can do that too!)
So the question is, why aren’t we already just following our dreams?
I believe that the answer to that question is that we innocently misunderstand how things work… we misunderstand the game of life.
Instead of playing the game of happiness and freedom, we’re playing the game of survival…
For me, playing the game of happiness looks like hanging out with my family and friends, and using my work as my hobby. Last month, I traveled to L.A. with some friends to learn from one of the best coaches in the world. When passport control in California stopped me, I really struggled to answer the question; “are you travelling for business or pleasure?”!
Whether like me, you want to travel around the world learning psychology, or you want to hang out with your loved ones, or start your own business, life can be so enjoyable. It’s not about surviving, it’s about enjoyment.
My book is designed to help you be who you want to be, and live a happy and full life.
I’m planning on running a workshop around my book launch on the 5th and 6th July 2025 in Christchurch, Dorset. The waitlist will soon be open so watch this space. I can’t wait to share my life’s work with you…
