What’s your Superpower?
We all have natural skills, talents, strengths, or gifts. We just might not know what they are yet.
Sometimes, if we are lucky, we know what they are from a young age.
If we are really lucky, we were encouraged to nurture them and given opportunities to do so.
Other times, we might not discover them until adulthood.
Sometimes we get told to focus on developing our weaknesses.
I worked with someone recently who was in their sixties, and is only now just getting in touch with their greatest passion and gift in life.
So what about you?
Did you like me, not find out for forty years?
Did you bury it like some people?
But guess what… It’s all about mindset! (You’ll get used to hearing me say this).
When I worked in the NHS, so many of my colleagues were burnt out. When I started recognising this in myself, I went to my supervisor for support.
At this time, I was the top therapist in the team getting the most effective results from clients.
And here’s what happened. My supervisor told me that I cared too much. They said I need to dial down my empathy. They said my empathy was my greatest weakness.
Let me say that again. Empathy was my greatest weakness.
I was told that in order to sustain being a therapist, that I had to care less.
I came away feeling deflated. Did I have it wrong? I thought my empathy was a strength. But was it a weakness?
But life is full of choices. And I saw things very differently.
I could limit my empathy, and I could stay working in the NHS. I could probably avoid burnout, but I would have to take something I love doing, and dampen it down and get less powerful results.
Or, I could go private. See less clients. But give the clients I did see, an exceptional experience.
And that’s what I did. I played to my strengths.
And then, I made a conscious decision to nurture my skills. To hone my strengths and develop my natural gifts through study and practice.
I always had a lot of empathy. But way before I knew what empathy actually was, it was sometimes very confusing.
I would walk into a room and see someone, and suddenly feel different. It wasn’t until I learnt that I was extremely empathetic, that I realised I was picking up on the other person’s emotions.
I am just naturally a very caring and compassionate person. I care a lot about people.
I was the sort of person that would be in the school playground, and see a new kid starting school and go over and make friends with them.
I would feel so confused when I would see another kid bully someone, because I was wondering why they would want to hurt another human being.
These days, when I’m with someone one on one, I know how they are feeling. Sometimes, I know how they are feeling better than they do.
The shadow side of having a lot of empathy is that without honing this skill, I previously neglected my own needs, because I was so attuned to everyone else’s.
And I’ve worked with a lot of people that have done the same.
You see, each strength has a shadow side – A side that left to it’s own devices has the power to knock us off balance.
I learnt to develop this skill, to practice empathy, and learn how to use it to help others, and to help me.
For me personally, I also learnt that I was a very good listener.
And I trained myself to be a better listener. Through my years studying to become a Psychotherapist I learnt active listening skills. Through my Mindfulness Teacher training I learnt to listen without expectation, and to see the person right in front of me.
So I became an exceptional listener.
My final skill is in teaching. I’m gifted at simplifying things. I have the ability to break complex things down enough so that anyone can understand it. And that’s what makes me a good teacher.
Add these three skills to my passion in self-growth, development and human potential, there was really only one profession for me.
And so, as a Mindset Coach, this is how I help you. I listen. I feel you. I get a really good picture of your World, and how you see things. Then I show you my World. I teach you what else is possible.
That’s my three steps to coaching. Listen. Understand. Coach.
So, what is your superpower?
What are you naturally gifted at?
What came naturally to you as a child?
What is the potential kryptonite? The dark side, that if you don’t consciously hone it, it has the potential to unbalance you?
I invite you to nurture these skills. To hone these talents. And to step into what makes you more powerful by honouring what you have been gifted.
If you have a strength that you would like to turn into a superpower, or if you have a perceived ‘weakness’ that you would like to turn into a strength then let’s book a session together.
As a Life Coach in Dorset, we can work face to face if you are in Dorset yourself, or we can work over Zoom.
Chris